Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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