Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Randomize