How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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