You're a womanizer and a bitch.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize
