I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
People with herpes should wear stickers.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
