Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
