I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
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