i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Randomize
