Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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