I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
It's blow job season.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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