Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
You pole danced in your parka.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize