I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
