your room smells of hookers.
And success
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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