He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize