Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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