Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Randomize
