Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
