'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
