Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
