I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
