I just made out with a guy for $7.
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
