last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Randomize
