it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
