so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize