That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Randomize
