I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
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