dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
