actually, I'm a sock model
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
