Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
