we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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