So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
