i think i have two assholes
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
