I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
how drunk are you?
Several
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
