that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
My vagina just recognized that song.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
