he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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