I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
