mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
i think i have herpe
just one?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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