no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Randomize
