marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I think my fart just growled at me.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
