I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
why do cheetos always look like penises
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
