but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
