Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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