We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
