I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
