This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
