Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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