grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
not ubering you a puppy
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
