just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize