I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
