gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
